The Big Black and White Game
(22-31 January 2002)

31 January 2002
-There are times (now, for example) where I feel extremely guilty for how well I'm doing relative to everyone else.  I don't mean in terms of school or similar meaningless tripe, but my life is really great right now.  & how many times did you think you'd ever hear me say THAT?  But so many people I care about are having a really tough time.  & I'm trying to be supportive, to help out, but I can't help but feel that a little of their misfortune is laden in my happiness.  While I know in my heart that that's irrational & crazy, I can't help but feel a little bit of that, & that's just funky.
-Where's the NorthAms Cup?  I couldn't find it in the Admin Building or the Senate Office...
-Restored to academic good standing!  Woohoo!  & even if I get straight-D's this term (don't worry, Mom & Dad, I'm not actually going to), I still graduate above a 3.0.  So that's all good.  Only 36 more days of school... ever.
-It's really interesting when dreams follow certain events & what that reveals about both.

30 January 2002
-Man, I had almost my entire plan come together at the last minute to actually get my work done.  Then I recalled that the Library won't let you print without an up-to-date copy card with money on it.  Now we'll have to see if this works out, but I haven't read the stuff anyway.  Maybe this is why I never took a writing intensive before... they actually are READING intensive.
-From yesterday's elections, Crack's the new President of the team & I'm out on a rail.  Or at least out.  That's going to take a lotta getting used to.  Andy Bragin, one of the novii, nominated me for Captain (for a semester), but I declined after some thought, mostly not wanting to be like Brad & also knowing it would be wrong to take a younger person's place...

29 January 2002
-Well, today's the day.  My final day of 'Deis team presidency, & soon we'll have someone very very different, whomever it may be.  But first, to fix cars!
-Cars fixed!  All better now.  & Em cleaned my room, too, so now everything's getting better!  Just have to get through my last few hours as debate team Prez without people killing each other...

28 January 2002
-Sometimes it takes me too long to respond to e-mails.  So much thought is required, & then I just feel better about replying in person instead.
-Emily & I have now spent a solid month together, since her re-arrival in Albuquerque on 27 December.  It's been one of the best months of my life, if not the best, & it's amazing how much more comfortable it's made both of us.  I'm only the least bit worried about how we'll deal with being apart for any time at all after this.  Don't have to worry about that quite yet, though...
-I forgot to post earlier that I saw "The Royal Tenenbaums" on Sunday night.  Overall, I liked it quite a bit, but in much the same way that I liked "American Beauty"... though I think this movie is a little more aware of its own self-effacing irony.
-Well, I really hope I helped.  & can help in the future.  Beyond that, there's little more to say.  Just to hope, & to help, this is what I live for.

27 January 2002
-Good seeing Stina for the first time in quite a long while.  She & Russ seem to get along quite well, & everyone had a good time with late-night board games.
-Sunday remains crash-day, but it keeps starting later & later...
-I have so much to reflect on sometimes, with so few conclusions.  It's like being snow.

26 January 2002
-Back from Amherst early (well, before the end of the day).  We had an early exit, but Bernbaum got his first break before we dropped in quarters in a bizarre & dubious round.  So it goes.  We beat a lot of big teams this weekend, though, including being the only people to defeat the "MIT Ivy League Assassins", who were the top two speakers & won the tourney.  All in all though, a fun tournament.
-What wasn't as much fun was drivin' back from the tournament & seeing Crack on the roadside.  After pulling over, we examined that the rest of our team had pulled over to deal with Crack's newly-broken car.  Fortunately they were only 15 miles from 'Deis on the Mass Pike, so it didn't take long to get everyone home, but it was awfully cold.

25 January 2002
-Bernbaum's improved a ton since I last saw him debate & this makes me optimistic about this weekend.  We shall definitely see how it goes.  It's amazing, sometimes, what cases end up seeming to work the most when one actually juxtaposes them with real life.
-I can barely believe it's the last week of my debate team presidency... I just hope things are amicable on Tuesday.  That's all I care about at this point.
-There's some mornings when I just can't wait to debate.  Kate reports that she's not sure if she wants to debate today.  I have those Fridays too, but today I'm rarin' to go.  Sometimes I wake up & have all the fervor & anticipation of the morning of my first HS tournament, at Eldorado High in '93.  Today is one of those blessed mornings.  I just worry about what's going to happen on those mornings in a semester, when I no longer have debate.

24 January 2002
-Crazy!  It's actually time for school again & stuff.  Knowing this to be my last semester makes everything vastly easier.  4 classes to freedom.

23 January 2002
-Back with the beans, this time for much longer.  This means I'll actually be hanging out with folks & such 'round here.  Though I did get in late, & start the hangin' out with a round of quite tiring basketball.  This was fun, but now I'm sore.  Physically.  Still a bit tired too, but I only have one class tomorrow & none till Monday after that.  Ah well.  Time for more hangin' out...

22 January 2002
[from Princeton, New Jersey]

-So apparently Fish might be coming out for his Spring Break, which would be awesome.  Maybe even debating with me as the Brandeis/UCSD hybrid somewhere.  This is very exciting to me.
-Discovering that almost every major publisher in the world other than Random House fails to accept unsolicited manuscripts is not cool.  There's a fair number of other things I can try while I wait for old RH to figure out what the heck it takes for them to write me back on-schedule.  Ah well.
-I'm thinking of adding some new annual features here at the 'Mid as a sort of year-in-review.  We'll see...
-In accordance with the above entry, here's my top 5 movies of last year.  I guess this could become an annual thing.  I'm also thinking about a top 5 books I read last year, but that's a much more random & less actually relevant-to-2001 category.  Ah well.  It's something for now.  & now that my class schedule's set, I realize how little time I'll have for updating & doing fun stuff like this starting in just a couple days...


Introspection, My Worst Friend* (Current)
Ye Olde Archive (Past)
The Blue Pyramid (Source)

Tell me this is not the end...*

*-lyrics from an as-yet unreleased song, "The Same Old Frontiers", by SWClayton.