The Traveler
(23 November - 2 December 2001)
2 December
2001
[from Princeton, New Jersey]
-Sigh.
1 December 2001
-It's balmy outside in the middle of the night. Balmy!
In
December. What's up with that?
-Well, we had one good round out of six,
making it the
worst MIT tourney since I debated with Jeff Light freshman year. So it goes.
I just
wonder how much it pays to debate ethically in this event. But at least the
team was
supportive in the wake of said troubles. Ah well... maybe some time off will
be good.
30 November 2001
-I guess numb beats overwhelmed.
-I need to start
writing again. There's a restlessness in my perspective &
communication that comes from a lack of fiction. Soon, I won't have
dumb academic papers competing with valuable writing.
-MIT probably
can't live up to last year, but if it comes close, then I'll be in much
better sorts.
-Nothing to get going like writing a brand new
case thought of in the shower! Woohoo!
-Even if
everything else is a disaster, we'll definitely win the MIT
official tournament Risk game, right? I'd imagine that'll be
consolation no matter what.
29 November
2001
-Is everyone's mind as much of their enemy as mine is
of me? I'm not sure that was functional in terms of English, &
it's getting un-functional in terms of life. Things are great!
Why do I have to be prompted to find the gray lining? If only
these were voluntary choices. If only I had more control. Oh
well... it's just a mind.
28 November
2001
-Maybe I shouldn't have left. Empathy
prompts me to just want to
magically remove all surrounding pain. Life is great, but
not easy in the times of
distance. & all the more difficult when I can't help as
much as I want to.
-Ooh, I'm updating from the Library! I
feel like such a rogue. But I never take my 15-minute breaks
that I theoretically have, so they can just deal. Anyway,
today has really been kinda lousy. For no reason I can
explain. There's the obvious absence, but there's also been
an undertow of disconnect today too. Others have confirmed
this. Lisha's updating like a mad fiend. I dunno what
more to explain, but there's something making me feel blukky...
yes, that's an exact term. & more lonely than I should.
Bleh.
-Also, I have only one Hirsch class left in my 'Deis
tenure. If it's as dull as the one today, I'm gonna be
upset.
-I kinda hope my bosses at the Library &/or Hirsch
don't read this. Yeah.
27 November
2001
-While still long & uneventful, this train
trip was greatly better than
the last eastern seaboard journey. No depressed poem from
this one, for example.
Now I just have to get through the next week & a half.
But boy do I have one
thing to look forward to: Risk at MIT! That's going to
be great.
-Good for
Russ.
-Speaking of MIT, here comes the flood... 12.5 teams,
baby! Let's see if we can
keep the 3-year streak going...
26 November 2001
[from
Princeton, New Jersey]
-Now back to the East Coast.
-Traveling with a companion
is infinitely
better than traveling alone. Traveling with the person you love is
infinitely better
than traveling with another companion.
-Facing any semester's home stretch is
still
daunting. Or just psychologically exhausting.
25 November 2001
[from
Clovis, California]
-I had a dream last night that it was the 2002 Brandeis
tournament & I
was still the TD. I kept saying throughout the dream that it seemed like
YESTERDAY had
been the 2001 tourney. I woke up to it being 8 yesterdays
instead.
-Returning to Visalia
was like putting the past through a shredder in some ways. First off,
everything was
infinitely smaller. That makes enough sense, given that I am much larger
than during my
last visit in 1987. But I noticed such different things! The
surrounding
neighborhoods felt different, the town had a different feel, so much of it felt
insignificant
compared to the grander views of my earliest years. At the same time, seeing
things that
were familiar, like my house, the library, & my school, was incredible.
14 years is a
long time, but it was so nice to go back again.
-Not only was that Thai food
incredible, but
the dinner with Em's parents & her was the most comfortable I believe I've
been the whole
trip. It's been a really great time... I still think big families are best
for me in
smaller doses. But a wonderful dinner to close out a wonderful visit.
24 November 2001
[from
Clovis, California]
-Feeding animals in the rain. It's like Oregon, but with
llamas!
-All of that restaurant thought Em's niece Megan was our child.
Freaky.
-If only Martin could see this train factory. For a peek at
what I just
saw, head to RMIRailworks. Pretty
neat stuff.
Em's dad gets to play with toy trains for a living!
-A return to the Old
Spaghetti
Factory in Fresno! But with Em's whole family & in a different precise
location.
So much changed, so much the same.
23 November 2001
[from
Clovis, California]
-It's not the busiest bowling day of the year. But I
still won 2 of
the 3 games with marginal scores.
-"Life as a House" reminds me of
"American
Beauty" & that old conversation with Fish & his mother in freshman
year of HS or
some such ancient time. you build your house & you have to live in it.
But it's
nice to go on a "date" with Emily, even if the movie's not perfect.
The movie
just tried to break from predictable by being too unpredictable to be realistic.
Ah well.
A good time overall.
Introspection, My Worst
Friend* (Current)
Ye Olde Archive (Past)
Tell me this is not the end...*
*-lyrics from an as-yet unreleased song, "The Same Old
Frontiers",
by SWClayton.