Those Barren Leaves
(6-15 April 2005)

15 April 2005
-Poker night was tiny last night, & Jon Bernbaum ended up taking down the big haul.  It didn't feel like poker night at all for a variety of reasons, not the least of which was Josh-Z & Em poring over our wedding photos for almost an hour.  Which reminds me that I should scan some more of those into the webpage... right after I update this page in the first place, put up the Animal Quiz, & catch up with the rest of my writing.  Sigh.
-Nice to have done the taxes a while back.  Refund schmefund.

14 April 2005
-Went back for my final run at Oaks... depending on how I did, I was going to make it my final & it is.  The place is a den of iniquity.  Or to be more realistic & less dramatic, the place is set up for the limit game, which I'm not good at & don't really like.  I'm just not good enough at limit to compete with the people there.  & as far as I can tell, the best strategy at low-level limit is to come with a huge bankroll & see every single flop.  I played for two hours last night without winning a single hand (I 3-way split one for the only time I got chips back), but the hands I would've won were on terrible down cards.  On everything actually good that I played, I got rivered or turned by some ridiculous draw that I couldn't bet out.  Been down one time, been down two times, never going back again.
-Congratulations to Justin & Bragin for coming in as the fifth team at Nats last weekend!  Also to Lina for being top novice speaker!  It seemed like an upset-heavy octos at Nats with most all the big favorites taking a spill, & 'Deis upending one of the TOTYs.  Very exciting finish to the year!  Have I ever mentioned that I miss debate?

13 April 2005
-Feeling a fair bit better, but still not strong enough to face the meetings the way they've been going.  I just don't want to rush back & get a relapse.  I've had enough of those to know.
-Much improved by the afternoon, & ended up wandering back to Oaks to lose a fair bit of money.  I really should've gotten out when I was up $25 in the first hour, but the fun overwhelmed my self-interest, & I got hooked into giving it all back & then some.  Bleh.  Not feeling too sure about that anymore.
-Oh, now I'm just a bad person.  That's no good at all.  Crap.
-Let's start working on something worthwhile for once!

12 April 2005
Happy Birthday to Colleen Garin
Happy Birthday to Clea Wilson

-Brandzy came over late last night & hung out for a little bit... we kept hearing what sounded like a coyote just outside the library, but ended up finally catching up on everything that's been going on.
-Feeling a tiny bit better, but still can't really keep food down.  I've eaten next to nothing in the last 72 hours.  Not going back to work again, & I might even feel strong enough to leave bed for more than an hour today.

11 April 2005
-Woke up about an hour or so into today & started throwing up profusely.  Couldn't even make it to the bathroom.  I've thrown up about 40 times already & am going nowhere today.  About the time that I was shaking uncontrollably & could feel my stomach searching for the last bit of acidic water to reject, I was pretty much at rock-bottom.  Not sure if it's flu or food poisoning, but I'm glad I didn't eat more than I did yesterday, which was almost nothing.

10 April 2005
-Ended up going back to, & staying at Oaks till four in the morning yesterday, leaving me with about 2 hours of sleep.  Made back almost all of the money I'd dropped earlier in the day, though, so it was all good.  & whenever I sleep the most at this job, I feel the most tired & vice versa.  So I'm all set now.

9 April 2005
-Actually ventured to Oaks Card Club in Emeryville for the first time today.  Fish & I ended up sitting next to each other at the table.  It was a great deal of fun & though we each dropped about $20, it was a great time.  The biggest drawback is that they only have limit hold-em tables, so the game I'm most trained to play (no-limit) is unavailable.  As I see it, the limit game is a lot more about luck, as people will always play to the river if they're drawing on something & they can't be chased out.  Still, I feel like we held our own for a few hours.
-Went to Ed's birthday shindig, which was an odd conglomeration of folks.  I ended up making guac for everyone, which was very hit or miss with various people.  Ended up talking shop with Cameron & Ed for way too long, where Cam made the prediction that I will never actually leave the job.  Who knows.

8 April 2005
-I remember when the 8th of April just stuck out in my mind as a pivotal day of sorts.  I feel things swirling as being pivotal, but today just seemed mired in the same old mud.  At least I'm talking it out, looking for conclusions, trying to find a viable escape...

7 April 2005
-Oh yes, I've defaulted on discipline again.  At least this time it's not a total meltdown... I'd already done my quota for notes, but nothing over & above for this month.  I really should've taken care of this a week ago, because there's unnecessary egg on my face that just didn't have to be there.

6 April 2005
-Told my boss today that I was applying for other stuff & probably wouldn't be able to give a full month's notice as they announced they wanted.  Who can give a month's notice?  Regardless, now everything's out on the table & I feel pretty good about that.  Nothing is certain or definite, but then we don't even know if the house is staying open more than another month!

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