Talking World War III Blues
(20-29 June 2004)

29 June 2004
-An easy, almost effortless day.  It's been a remarkably good week of work given all the actual events that have taken place.  Now I just have to finish the work of the past few weeks on paper.

28 June 2004
-Feeling great!  Energy usually isn't this high going into work these days...
-So, you know what I said 56 days ago about it being utterly moronic to have glass windows in a level 14 group home?  It's still true today!  Arguably even more so.  Well, you know what they say about banging your head into a wall... it does feel good when you stop!

27 June 2004
-Long day, but solid & somewhat uneventful.  Which in my line of work is a Good Thing.  Lots going on this week, mostly with paperwork to catch up on & then kickball playoffs, Jake will be here, & the CC concert!

26 June 2004
Happy Birthday to Mom
-Last night I continued my long career of seeing good movies on opening night with a viewing of "Fahrenheit 9/11".  As someone who may have more combined respect/admiration for both Ray Bradbury & Michael Moore than anyone else on the planet, it's hard for me to know what to say over the conflict they've been having about the title.  You can check the details on that issue here.  While I can see Ray's point about being asked permission, I do feel that names of popular books/movies are somewhat public domain, especially for spoofing or slight alterations to make an allusion.  If I felt that Moore were trying to disrespect or poke fun at Ray, I might feel differently.  But Ray also disapproves of the internet & video games, so this is not the first time I've had to side against him.  Regardless of which, the movie is great, but definitely has one predominant flaw.  Moore is well on the record as saying that he will support anyone who has a chance, in his mind, of beating Bush in the upcoming election.  There are definite moments where that fact bleeds through this movie & prevents it from having even more of a damning impact than it does.  I would personally love a nice clip of Kerry's defense of his vote on the war at the time of the original Congressional vote, for example.  Or of Kerry's specific refusal to be the lone Senator to back an objection to the certification of the 2000 election, for that matter.  If Moore were willing to indict Bush as someone who almost certainly knew about 9/11 & was probably somewhat responsible for it WHILE indicting Kerry for being spineless & selfish to the point of political uselessness, then he'd be an objective documentarian.  But this is clearly a piece designed at appealing to average Americans, as can be found as the film plants its flag on the concept of American soldiers being victims of the Iraq war & only briefly intimating that they are part of the problem with their own moral culpability.  But of course, that is all that's wrong with the movie... otherwise, it's excellent.  The first 45 minutes are purely chilling & moments thereafter of scenes from the war itself are among the most powerful anti-war footage ever shot.  Everyone should see this movie.  It looks like I may see it again tonight, in fact.
-When did inertia become my default?

25 June 2004
-I am awash with personal paradox.  What I do know is that it's a poor time to make decisions in the upcoming days.
-It seems that, in general, when things are lowest is when the biggest opportunity arises.  The trick is realizing how good that opportunity is amidst a bad losing streak.

24 June 2004
-Kickball was amazing today, as we won 9-7, scoring a record number of runs in only 4 innings (actually that mark was a full third of the runs we've scored all year, across 10 games).  Fish & I both got RKI's & made all our catches.  We finished the regular season 3-5-2 & now are on a hot streak entering the playoffs (which all 16 league teams are invited to).  As Stina pointed out, I really am craving competition these days.  But it's so much fun!
-Had a great conversation with Zimmy about American politics & why I would never ever vote for John Kerry, even if I were voting, which we all know I won't do until February 2006 at the earliest.  Zimmy initially thought I was voting in New Mexico, which has the power to decide American elections now because of it's immense swing-state reputation.  But I am neither voting nor in New Mexico.  Regardless, it was great to have a moment of being back in debate mode.  The debate wound up reminding me that I really do hope that Kerry loses to Bush by a margin that is less than the Ralph Nader votes in key states.  I wonder how many elections in a row the Democrats would have to lose under those circumstances before they picked a decent nominee.

23 June 2004
-The whole day off!  Neat.
-After a ridiculous & frustrating losing streak, my foray into online real-money poker seems to have hit a snag.  I am still up overall for my efforts.  58 cents.
-Anyone noticed how much weight there seems to be on the turn of the month from June to July?  Both personally & globally, it seems like it's a half-week that will change the horizon for some time.

22 June 2004
-It amazes me that some people feel better about the doctor's office than I take for granted.
-Well that went against specific instructions.  But I will defend the action to the last.  Joy!

21 June 2004
-Drew got in very very early this morning, after we jaunted to Au Coq's, home, & back to Au Coq's.  He actually took up residence in his sublet at 2 in the morning or so.  & the summer is in full swing!
-Em's sick, which did give her the unbelievable benefit of a day off, but is still generally sad.  Hopefully she will be able to recover some strength which the entire month of June has been plundering.
-Consistency.  That's the hard one to master.
-Yesterday, Em & I were talking about when I got new tires for the Kia & figured it had been roughly 6-8 months ago.  I guess I could've looked at the receipt, but instead I Googled my own site for my discussion of it at the time... & discovered it was over 17 months ago, in January 2003.  Though Sears, who wants to sell me tires, says my old ones are still good for another couple months (that sentence was for you, Dad).  Point is that this page, among its many other virtues, helps keep me in check & orders my perception of the strange beast that is time.  So much of me wishes that I had kept something like this my whole life, even though I was once so embarrassed by entries in a diary I kept (in 2nd grade, in DC) that I covertly snuck it into a trash can & it's now rotting in an Oregon landfill.  The regret I feel for that action fuels every word I write on this site.  Everyone's life is hopelessly embarrassing, if one chooses to think of oneself as a perfect front.  If one realizes that humans are a study in The Attempt, & that every fulfillment is an astounding victory, it gets a lot easier to handle the apparent loss of privacy that throwing one's doors open to the world entails.  I think my job has helped me better understand how flawed we all are & how every struggle is a worthy one as well.  Patience is everything.  Thanks for the patience to meander through this ramble with me.  It's all strung together in my mind, & the wave of its relief is sufficient to mitigate anything I wish I hadn't written.
-I forgot to mention that we saw the Bushman in SF a couple days ago.  Man, how I love the Bushman.  He sits behind some thick foliage which he brings to the Wharf, posts up next to a trash can to appear like a standard bush, then leaps the leaves out at people while growling.  Barrett & I once figured that he makes $100/hour or so doing this.  I think I've posted fully on this guy before, but he really is my hero.  The jolt of awareness that he brings to everyone gets people to think, one scared person at a time.  & with such a sense of humor!  I think I try to write fiction the way that the Bushman performs his art.  Or at least with similar motives in mind.

20 June 2004
-Exit Mesco & Co.  A good time was had by all, methinks.  Yar.
-So exhausted.  4 Incident Reports written in a shift is a record... one that I don't hope to compete with anytime soon.  It was especially neat since those were all consecutively numbered in the Seneca system, meaning no one else needed to write IR's in that span.  Four in a row is a record that should stand for all-time.  Please.

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