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You're Cyprus!
Your parents probably had different ethnic backgrounds and now they're almost certainly divorced, or at least they argue all the time.  You mostly just wish they'd leave you alone instead of using you as a pawn in their tortured conflict with each other.  Instead, you've become the battleground for a fight that doesn't really feel like it's yours.  You'd rather just go fishing.  But that doesn't look likely in the immediate future.  Just keep cooking with olive oil and you'll live longer, at least.

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