Song for the Asking
(4-13 October 2001)
13 October 2001
[from College Park, Maryland]
-I'm really glad something good came of my being on the APDA Board, because otherwise it'd be a huge regret right now that I ran.
-Ah, the sliminess of my favorite APDA team. At least we broke in theoretically dubious territory. Congrats to Spurling!
-Emily better get used to the idea of being SOTY.
12 October 2001
[from College Park, Maryland]
-Riding with the Princeton team is fun, but seems bizarre. So much of my debate career has been spent in conjecture & rivalry regarding this team. Now I feel like an honorary part of it & that's just weird to reconcile.
-Today's collision of worlds is admittedly less fun than a week ago. But still quite pleasant. Plus, Steve-o's here! That always makes for a better tournament.
-I seem to have found disproportionately funny kids to spend most of my time with.
11 October 2001
-So this weekend should be mighty interesting. Once one gets over the bizarre idea that Maryland is the "South", which is the case in the APDA debate world, one will see that many "Southern" schools seem to think they're very upset with 'Deis. The thing I'm upset with is that when we try to host a novice tournament on a Sunday specifically NOT to oppose a sanctioned Friday/Saturday (unopposed) tourney, & SEND TEAMS to the Fri/Sat, we're acting in good faith without getting credit for doing so. The timing is made worse by the fact that Hopkins wants a last-minute schedule change to oppose us, leaving 2 tourneys that were unopposed last year against each other, one of which is ours. Clearly we weren't going to grant this without a discussion of Gris's favorite thing in the world, an APDA meeting. All this ends up meaning that people are unlikely to look favorably upon us this weekend in many regards. I'm starting to believe that some sort of revenue-sharing is a good answer for APDA, just to stop all this complaining about tournament draw. Then again, we still wouldn't be able to pay the bills then with this little support from our admin. Sheesh.
-But enough about all that... after the midterm today, I'm heading to Jersey! Now catch this surreal moment, please: who would EVER have predicted that I'd EVER be excited (or even marginally plussed) by the thought of going to Jersey? But I am, in a big way. How times have changed.
10 October 2001
-These transcendantly beautiful moments of life, where all the
pain & challenge of everything seems perfectly worth it to get to a given
time & place, these moments are starting to become almost regular events.
& while they seem commonplace in their frequency, they are anything
but commonplace in their feeling or verve or impact on my existence. I'm
just overwhelmed by the opportunity that is life in general, & that my life
seems to have become. I am a very fortunate person. Apparently, I
always have been... I just didn't get to know how much so till recently. 9 October 2001 8 October 2001 7 October 2001 6 October 2001 5 October 2001 4 October 2001
-No matter how much academic stuff seems to pile up, I always remember how to take care of it rather quickly. Awfully straightforward stuff in the end.
-Shmini Atzeret: another reason my life at this school is almost too easy.
-Studying in the Mep House is just not a functional plan.
-Bartolo Colon? You've GOT to be kidding me.
-I feel somewhat behind on certain things, but they all seem to be things that don't matter. That frankly have never mattered, but that reality has just come into clearer focus of late.
-So not only was this probably the best weekend of my life (no exaggeration), but it was capped off by a free Counting Crows show at Yale which Emily & I managed to get into via Cusick & friends. Not only was everyone we've ever known from Yale in apparent attendance, but the concert included the most moving moment in my history of concert attendance. Given the events of yesterday, Adam Duritz started singing a medley of "Where Have All the Flowers Gone?" & "Blowin' in the Wind" in the middle of "Round Here". I promptly started crying profusely. The whole song took something like 20 minutes & was simply perfect. Also solid was the "Thunder Road" alternate of "Rain King" & Duritz's pre-encore speech against the war. What a beautiful show, a beautiful night, a beautiful life I seem to have fallen into. Have I mentioned how grateful I am?
-How is attacking the Pentagon a terrorist act, while attacking the Taliban Ministry of Defense is not? I honestly don't understand the distinction. Can someone explain?
-Well, now everyone's heard of Kandahar & Herat. In the old days, if I told my friends or anyone else about my Dad's great stories of the fabled car journey from Kandahar to Herat, they'd look at me blankly & wonder what far-off childhood my father had lived. Now they know it's between two bombings. What could be a simpler identification than that?
-So much I could say, but I just don't know how. Certainly not here. But I can't remember a time when I was this happy.
-On to New Haven to see Counting Crows in a free show at Yale...
-So much support.
-So Justin & I have definitely had fun at this tourney, but it's my first Harvard with multiple losses. Wouldn't you know it's the 2 judges who didn't flow? At least we both spoke okay & won all our opps.
-Debate can be awfully hit-&-miss.
-Yeah, this is definitely the way life should be.
-Barrett! & Jess! & Lisha! It's a full-scale Academy reunion. The collision of worlds is often great fun.
-Um. Now I have to be quite introspective about this Introspection page. That, & feel like a bad person.
-Just gotta remind myself that nothing in life is about things being easy. Going incredibly well, perhaps. Making complete sense, absolutely. But easy? No, not easy.
-Exactly one thing matters today.
9 October 2001
8 October 2001
7 October 2001
6 October 2001
5 October 2001
4 October 2001
Introspection, My Worst
Ye Olde Archive (Past)
Tell me this is not the end...*
*-lyrics from an as-yet unreleased song, "The Same Old Frontiers", by SWClayton.