Nuthanger Farm Again
(8-17 December 2000)

17 December 2000
[from Albuquerque]

-"Almost Famous" was almost good.  I mean, it wasn't bad either, it was just mildly entertaining without really having much point.  Though I liked it more than Kunx did.  I guess I'm supposed to be careful what I say about movies these days though... apparently, my readership's bigger than I might think & some unbeknownst-to-me Brandeisian e-mailed me recently to ask that I downgrade my opinion of "Pay it Forward" relative to "Magnolia".  There's no question in my mind that the latter was a better film, but I did see some merit in the former as well.  Difference of opinion is certainly common practice 'round here.  I just find it interesting that people feel compelled to comment.  Hey, it's groovy with me.
-The more I think about it, the more I really have no interest in attending grad school.  Everything for a reason.  We shall undoubtedly see.
-Barrage of e-mails to write now!

16 December 2000
[from Albuquerque]

-Apparently Ben Harper's going to be in Beantown on the Thursday before he'll be at 'Deis, so maybe I can just pull off seeing him & going to NorthAms.  That'd be the fuller scoop on the aforementioned 3 February 2001 dilemma.  Anyone wanna go with me?  I might still try to catch the 'Deis show, too, but now that there's an Orpheum show on the 1st of February, that's much more appealing.  Anyone?
-Nobody loves me.  Well, one nobody in particular.  Hm.  Maybe it's just not in the cards.
-If I ever have a band, which may or may not be looking more probable given recent events, we've got to do a fast cover of "Visions of Johanna".  What a song.  & it's just begging for a speedy rendition.
-Gris is absolutely right.  "Proof of Life" was one of the worst movies in a goodly long time.
-The airport has become a haven of the bizarre.  Picking up Jaqster tonight brought encounters with all sorts of folk best described as dubious.  Even Matt Sullivan's mother was there, & she kept looking at me as if she knew me, but my hair couldn't possibly be THAT long.  I think, all in all, that I'm glad she didn't say hi - there's a whole category of people that I earnestly don't know what I'd say to them if they tried to talk to me.  Communication is past & so conversation would seem fruitless.  But anyway, Jaque finally wandered off the back of the plane - an uncharacteristic place for him, to be sure.  The Frontier is an uncharacteristic place for none of us.
-Okay, how much money would I spend to ensure that I don't sacrifice my streak of attending every single debate weekend?  A fair amount.  But I bought 2 tickets to Ben Harper - anyone wanna join me?  Tickets are substantially worse than for Simon - I think they're in the 40th row or something.  But still not bad.  Let me know, people...

15 December 2000
[from Albuquerque]

-Since getting back to Nuevo Mexico, I haven't been able to stop eating.  Seriously, it's been all hunger all the time.  My Mom said it might have something to do with the altitude difference, but I doubt that.  I attribute the altitude to my almost constant headache since I've returned, but it doesn't seem to mesh with an appetite difference.  Let's just hope this changes or I'll never stop eating.
-"Unbreakable" was better than "Proof of Life".  That's almost all I can say for it.
-I'm soundly out of focus of late.  I don't even know why.  I suppose it's a transitional thing.
-Though I must say, I do like a few songs off the late Everclear album.  Some of them are terrible, but some are really awesome.  Little middle ground.
-It's later than it should be, isn't it?

14 December 2000
[from Albuquerque]

-The positive reaction to "Fleeting" has been overwhelming.  What I considered to be another of my basic poems, a little subpar perhaps, has been received as the dawn of my publishable age.  I'm not complaining, but I'm a mite bit confused.  Maybe my analysis that this was my "radio song" of my poems was just dead-on.
-Fish is nuts.  In every way.  But that's a good thing, I figure.
-I'm doing pretty darn well.  Not a lot to be anything but happy about.  I'm remarkably optimistic, really.

13 December 2000
[from Albuquerque]

-Home.  Frontier.
-I forget how alive New Mexico is after being away from it for a while, even if it's only 3 months or so.  The vibrancy always knocks me over upon return.  Though after having a flight rerouted through Vegas & taking approximately forever to get me home, a small wind would knock me over about now.  It's so good to be back.

12 December 2000
-& everything wraps up there about where it should.  We shall see.
-I'm not shelving another book for sooooooo long....
-Schneider is a qualmless individual.  He cracks me up, mind you.  But he's still qualmless.
-I'm gonna miss the skyline.  & a handful of people.  Many of whom I'll see in Scotland anyway.  Basically, folks, I'm outta here.  "I'm gone I'm gone I'm gone I'm gone I'm gone... I'm gooooooone...."  Catch you, as they say, on the flip side.

11 December 2000
-As I just wrote to Madeline, I am one big ball of euphoria right now.  Holy crud.  I just finished the 16-pager, & now I'm completely done.  Well, I technically have to finish the problem set, but I have a few hours to kick back.  Finally.  Days like this, I think relief might be one of the best feelings in the world, just like Mom always said.  Wow.  I'll be on a plane in 30 hours.  This, my friends, is the way to LIVE!
-Life is horribly complex.  & sometimes it's just horrible.  I can't even contextualize everything I should.  Sheesh.
-That's all for academics 2000, friends.  Tune in next year when we have academics 2001.  Ah, games are fun...

10 December 2000
-Drunk people crack me up.
-Nothing quite like setting a goal & following through.  Hoo-wah!  What a rush.  While I wouldn't die for a rush (remember this old joke, Johnny?), I certainly would write a paper for a rush.  Spiffy.  Just another paper, a problem set, & I'm OUTTA HERE!
-Sometimes, it wouldn't hurt anybody to be less cryptic!
-Drew Tirrell:  eternal optimist.  But he always seems to have such good REAsons for optimism...
-So, as per previous mention, one of my latest poems, "Fleeting", has made it into the esteemed company of "Where the Children Play", one of two local lit mags.  Though the company, when looking at it, isn't really all that esteemed.  But hey, I'll take it.  On an interesting sidenote, the entire magazine is devoid of short stories, making me think early already about next semester's submissions.  Either way, it's about time.

9 December 2000
-Time flies when you're having fun.
-It's good knowing I'm not the only one who feels devastatingly short of my motivational goals.  Who yearns to make each moment more productive.  Who demands that much more from life & every moment & wants to stop working for the future & start working for now to the benefit of others.  Who wants to write a book.  Who can't stand America.  Who believe in absolute truth & God & teaching children.  Sheesh.  You'd think there'd be more of us out there.
-It's so bizarre to be on campus on a Saturday & not running a debate tourney.  What's going on?  This is nuts!
-I am so good at procrastination.  Make it stop.  Someone please hold me to the standard that if I don't finish my Personal Identity paper by dawn on the 10th (that'd be in about 12 hours), I will cease to function or something.  I mean really.  I just have 30 pages of writing between me & freedom.  Why can't I just get it done?  Well, I know the answer to that - it's not due till I get on my plane.  Trouble is, I've already got 4 hours of work on Monday night... do I really want to follow that up with 30 pages of papers?  No, I actually would like to be done with everything by that time.  But I get so relaxed & distracted when I'm not sitting RIGHT on top of a deadline.  I just need to finish that paper tonight & everything'll be fine.  But first, I'm going to see a movie...

8 December 2000
-For the love of God, people, if you learn nothing else in this silly lifetime, please recognize that YOU HAVE CHOICES!  Life is about free will - that's the heart of the whole humanity experiment.  When are people going to see this for what it is?  Brandzy's even learning - he actually might not go into politics, believe it or no.  If that's not a proof of free will, I dunno what is!
-For the first time ever, I'm going to have work in a 'Deis lit mag.  Details to follow.
-Snow!  Ya lyoublou sneg!  (So much for transliteration - I don't think I can put actual Russian on this page...)
-Mike Specian at BU rocks!  He has a little TV hobby & had a digital camera at the MIT tourney.  As a result, he's compiled an entire RealPlayer based movie documentation of a summary of our semis round (lotto case!) against Yale A (Brian & Scott), plus a full coverage of the Final round (minus floor speeches) against Yale "The Power Team" D (Beth & Adam).  I'd put a link up here, but the total is 88 megs & I get this bad feeling that UNet might send me a nasty e-mail if I try to eek out a 100 MB quota from the 'Deis.  Maybe I'll include snippets though.  Anyway, I could easily IM you or ICQ some of it if you have any interest - Zimmy in a final round is going to be a rare commodity, I fear, & I'm ecstatic that someone got it on tape.
-For the love of the baby.
-I think Fish left his computer & AOLIM on for all of break.  Whoops.


Introspection, My Worst Friend* (Current)
Ye Olde Archive (Past)

Tell me this is not the end...*

*-lyrics from an as-yet unreleased song, "The Same Old Frontiers", by SWClayton.